


Oxytocin (Connverse)

by IKHK



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Relationship Advice
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-15
Updated: 2020-06-03
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:21:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,645
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23656783
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IKHK/pseuds/IKHK
Summary: After Steven's mental breakdown, he is considering some things about his life, his future, and the people around him. But the one person he thinks about the most is Connie. It seems normal, but his best friend is beginning to feel like more than just a friend. He knows he's had those feelings for a while, but has she?
Relationships: Connie Maheswaran/Steven Universe
Comments: 18
Kudos: 66





	1. Relationships

It had been only 2 weeks after Steven's mental (and physical) breakdown, and the boy was still recovering. He had booked multiple appointments with his new therapist, Dr. Wendt, and was receiving large amounts of affection and protection from the gems. Everything was changing around him as he spent the days reflecting on himself and his actions, and getting past them. Though only one thing kept sticking around in his mind, day after day. Connie.

Connie visited every night after his breakdown to check on him. She would bring books, movies, and sometimes even her violin. A couple times, she would fall asleep reading her new favorite book to him, and would end up staying the night. Her parents were very supportive of the two, and after Steven nearly destroyed the hospital and the entire city, Priyanka and Doug thought it would be best if Connie supported him throughout his healing process. After sending their daughter off to space to embark on a "diplomatic" mission to consult with one of the most powerful beings in the universe, they were willing to take this minor risk. Steven was grateful for Priyanka and Doug's flexible parenting, so he always made sure to send her home at the correct time, and if there was minor change in plans (like Connie falling asleep in the middle of reading a book), he would inform them ASAP. 

It was a Tuesday, and Connie had been hanging out at the beach house with Steven, vigorously studying whilst listening to Steven play the guitar. She worked and he played until the sun set and it was time for her to leave. After bidding a goodbye to the gems, Steven started the Dondai with Connie in the seat next to him and headed back to Connie's. Steven put the windows down, remembering how much Connie loved having the wind in her hair, and hummed to the tune playing softly on the radio. It was a gentle, cool night. He would've done anything to make Connie stay for longer on a day like this, but he knew that she would have a packed schedule the next day, and didn't want to get in the way. The song on the radio softly sang about relationships, broken hearts, and cheesy romantic clichés, which made Steven think. Was Connie into that sort of thing?

"Hey, Connie?" Steven hesitantly prepared to ask the question burning in his mind. She turned her head to face him as his eyes stayed fixed on the road. 

"Yes?" She answered softly. 

He took a deep breath, a blush slowly beginning to warm his cheeks. "What do you think about relationships?" He quickly asked, releasing the tension built up in his throat. 

She took a while to comprehend the question, thinking deeply about her answer. She propped her elbow up near the window and rested her chin on her hand as she let the cool night air gently caress her face. Finally, she answered. 

"Well, I think that if you truly love someone and they're fit for you, a relationship would be perfect to transition into. Personally, I'm not the biggest fan of schmaltz, but I think it all changes when you fall in love. Though nowadays I feel like people don't take the aspect of "dating" seriously. It's become more of a status symbol than a representation of real love, you know?" She shifted in her seat, arm still propped up on the car door. She looked at the blushing Steven next to her, her tone becoming gentler. "How about you, Steven? You got your eye on anybody?" Instantly, the pink on Steven's face deepened into a dark red. Connie giggled at the sight as Steven weakly shrugged in response. Connie's head turned back to face the window. 

He thought about it for a while as he let the deep blush on his face fade away. Was he interested in her? I mean, they had been friends for the longest time. Just friends. It all felt right. He didn't have a reason to ask her out or anything, right? As they pulled up to a red light, he looked over at the girl next to him. She was beautiful. But that was just normal Connie. Everyone knew she was beautiful. He watched as Connie's free fingers reached up to play around with her hair. Her hair. It was always soft and fluffy. Her hairstyle always suited her and showed off her gorgeous face. The fingers that played with her hair were slender and thin, and danced around on the fingerboard of her violin. Her hands were small but strong. She held a 4-pound sword in those hands, and fought many battles using them. They felt warm and delicate in his, and his heart always skipped a beat whenever she took his hand. 

This wasn't love, right? I mean, of course, he loves her. They're best friends. That's only natural. But he can't be romantically interested in her. That's just not how it works. They're friends. Just friends. 

"Steven! It's a green light!" Connie snapped her fingers in front of his face, causing him to move the car forward. 

"Oh, sorry. I just spaced out there for a second." He muttered. 

He got lost in his thoughts. It happened a lot. At this rate, it would probably become a hazard as long as Connie is in the car with him. 

As they pulled up in front of Connie's house, Steven's fingers fumbled at the wheel. He fought with his feelings as Connie gathered her things. 

"What's going on, Steven? Is there something wrong?" She asked, lightly touching his arm. He pulled back almost instinctually, his feelings conflicting within his head. Connie frowned, concerned. "I'm sorry. Are you feeling ok?" She tried to catch his eyes, but he refused to look directly at her. 

He instead responded, "I'm ok. I'm just... tired." 

Connie grumbled, taking his hand in hers. "If there's something you need to talk about, I'm here. Just... please don't lie to me. I know there's something wrong." She whispered. 

Steven sighed, defeated, and finally faced her. His fingers played with hers as he tried to gather his thoughts. "I don't know, I've just been thinking a lot about relationships. I probably shouldn't have popped the question in the first place." He admitted, looking down at their hands. 

Connie's expression changed into a forced smile. "You have your eye on someone. That's why you were so dazed during the car ride..." She doesn't continue. Her face looks almost disappointed as she lets go of Steven's hand. "If you need to talk about it, you can call me." She adds, beginning to get out of the car. He waves at her and smiles as she shuts the door behind her. 

When Steven got back to the beach house, he found Greg's van parked near the shore. Greg sat in the back of the van, strumming a few notes on his guitar with music playing on an old record player in the background. Steven approached Greg with a weak smile, showing that something was clearly wrong.

"What's up, Schtu-ball? How'd it go with Connie?" Greg asks, setting down the guitar. Steven sat down next to his father with a sigh, fumbling with the floor. "Is something up?" Greg asked, scooting in closer to his son. Steven thinks for a little while, and then decides to tell the truth. 

"I just... I think..." He took a deep breath, his face pink (not glowing pink lol). "I think I have a crush on Connie!" He blurted out, eyes closed shut. To his surprise, Greg didn't look phased. He just picked his guitar up and began to play a soft tune. Greg smiled and looked at his clearly embarrassed son, and then back to the ocean. 

"I don't think it's just a crush, kiddo." He chuckled, eyes fixed on the star-dotted horizon. 

Steven considered it for a moment, but his heart couldn't take it. "B-but I can't be in love! I'm too young! And especially at a time like this..." He stuttered, his foot beginning to tap restlessly on the ground. Greg laughed, tilting back a little. He smiled at his distressed son and gave his advice. 

"Steven... you're 16! Almost 17! You're not a kid anymore, and you're not really a teenager anymore either. You're becoming a man. And you can be in love regardless of your age. I mean, your mother was thousands of years old when we fell in love. I know gem age doesn't really matter, but people your age and even younger have fallen in love before. And you've known Connie for long enough that you'll have a lot of reasons to be in love with her, right?" He asked. Steven thought for a second, and then laid down on the floor of the van. 

"Of course. She's fearless, determined, hard-working, smart, she has a great sense of humor, and not to mention she's the most beautiful girl I've ever met in my entire life. Wow. I can't believe I just said that out loud." Steven admitted to his father. 

Greg sighed and reassured him. "Don't worry, kiddo. What happens in the van stays in the van." Steven smiled and sat back up. "Maybe you should ask her out?" Greg suggested, tilting his guitar to the side as he strummed a couple of notes and hummed to the tune. 

Steven shrugged. He knew that she'd be ok with him asking her out, considering she was ok with him proposing to her. But he didn't want to make any more mistakes. The proposal already landed him in the hospital, so how would that turn out if she rejected him?

"What if she rejects me?" Steven replies, worry in his eyes. 

Greg stopped humming and responded, "well, that's just a part of life. You'll get rejections and they'll feel terrible, but it all leads up to that person who will accept you. And I doubt Connie's going to say no anyway." 

Steven was startled. "What? Why do you say that?" He asked, placing his hand back down. 

"Well, she loves you, doesn't she? She comes over every day just to check on you, reads you stories, holds your hand, comforts you when you cry..." Greg trailed off, and Steven interjected. 

"But that's what best friends do! Maybe she's just trying to be nice." 

Greg laughed. "Of course she's being nice! But she's being nice to make you happy. She wants you to be happy because you make her happy. That's what love is- making sacrifices for the person or people you love." Greg added, entertained by Steven's lovestruck and confused look. 

Steven doesn't reply. He just stares into the horizon with his father as the night deepens. He thinks about it for a moment, and begins to smile.

"I'll ask her out, then."

"You will?"

"Yeah...

I love her."


	2. HIATUS UPDATE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little update from when we last left off.

Hello, my good friends! It is currently 11:58 PM, June 2d (almost 3d). 

Listen, I am so, so sorry for leaving AO3 behind for so long. The workload caught up to me, and I caved in. It occurred to me many times that I needed to update on my sudden hiatus, but I never got the chance. Let me tell you what's been going on.

1\. Studies

Homework and finals have caught up to me. I used to try my best to update at least a little bit every weekend, but I ended up attempting to catch up on studies instead. I've been pretty busy for the past few weeks, and I haven't had much time for anything but schoolwork.

2\. Art and Music

As I'm sure many of you know, I am sort of an artist. I commission pieces for friends online and irl, and I also take art classes after and during school. It's a huge time commitment along with my marching band and orchestra classes (plus piano lessons). I am a person of the arts, so it has taken up the majority of my attention for the past few weeks. If I'm not studying, I'm on Clip Studio or Procreate drawing something for somebody.

3\. BLM, ACAB, and the recent protests

You all are probably somewhat or fully aware of the recent protests regarding the #blacklivesmatter and #ACAB movements. For me, a high school student in America, the protests and riots have been especially prominent in my area. I and the people of my community have been doing whatever we can to support charities, donations to George Floyd's family, weekly events, etc. Unfortunately, due to my weak immune system and recent recovery from pneumonia, I have been unable to go outside to protest or participate in outside events.

4\. Mental Health

Don't get me wrong, this is a regular recurring thing for me. I have pretty regular depression which has been bothering me for the past 5 or so years. I've gotten better at coping, but sometimes it comes back when I least expect it. This past month happened to be one of those unexpected times. I experienced a pretty concerning amount of pain daily and cried A LOT. This definitely wasn't my worst round, and thank god for that, but it for sure took a lot out of me. I'm still recovering, sleeping a lot, eating very little (don't worry, it's also the side effect of the medication I'm taking for a recent illness), and focusing a lot less. My recent illness combined with my recurring depression took a massive toll on me this month and I really had to step away for a while to cope with it.

\------------------------------------------------------

Now, with all that said, I am proud to announce that the school year is coming to a close, which means I will be updating very, very soon. Don't you worry, I already have half of the next chapter written down ;). 

My hiatus will be done in a short while, I just need to wrap up my work for finals and some late commissions I need to get done. 

Also, I'll be releasing another bonus chapter after the second one in honor of pride month! It will voice many struggles I had before I came out as bisexual, and will involve Connie and Steven's attempt to reconnect their identities. I've had many friends ask me for advice in coming out, so I hope the upcoming chapter can help some of my other closeted LGBTQ+ friends out there too!

Again, sorry for the major, unannounced leave of absence, but I assure all of you that I will be back soon! 

Ciao, 

Goldie (IKHK)


	3. Midday Stars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter will be fluffier than the last and includes more Connie! Steven, at last, can't wait to ask out Connie, and plans out a romantic day under the stars. They end up sharing a moment that will last forever in their memories.

Steven woke with a start. It was better than last night, though, since for the past 2 days he hasn't gotten any sleep at all. Usually, he'd fall asleep almost automatically, but he was too busy thinking about Connie. He wanted to ask her out in the best way possible, but he also didn't want it to end up like the proposal. 

"Steven." Garnet calmly called him from the other side of the room. Steven leaped out from under the covers, heart racing.

"Oh, G-Garnet! You scared me!" He stuttered. His shoulders relaxed a bit and he sunk back into a sitting position on the side of his bed. Garnet sat next to him.

"I know you've been thinking about Connie." She stared blankly at the ground, eyes never facing him.

"H-how?" The blood rushed to Steven's face as his eyes darted away from Garnet.

"It's obvious. You brought her up 16 times in our conversation yesterday."

"Oh," he didn't face her, and continued to look the other way anxiously. "I-I think... I might be..."

"In love with her?"

"Y-yeah."

"Of course you are, Steven. You have been for at least 2 and a half years now."

"Huh. Then how come I never noticed?"

"You were too young to understand the concept of romantic love. When you began to understand, you didn't have time to act on it. There were better things to worry about at the time."

"I guess you're right. I spent most of my childhood just... saving people. Saving the planet. I never really had the opportunity to experience that type of thing."

"But now, Steven, you have that opportunity. Act on it."

"But how?"

"I can't be there to guide you through your love life. As long as you love her and she loves you, everything will be okay." 

Steven quietly groaned, thinking of all the possibilities that followed asking Connie out. Rejection could definitely be one of them.

"But... what if... she doesn't love me back?" Steven asked worriedly, rubbing the back of his neck.

"I wouldn't worry about that if I were you." Garnet replied, getting up off of Steven's bed and beginning to exit his room. As she walked downstairs, she gave him a thumbs up, back faced towards him.

"O...kay?"

Steven got up from his bed with a sliver of confidence in him. If Garnet told him there was nothing to worry about, then there was nothing to worry about. Right? 

He began to put his clothes on, slipping his jeans over his legs and his shirt over his shoulders. He was still extremely nervous, and his heart wouldn't stop pounding. If everything was going to be okay, then why was he so worried? Was this amount of anxiety normal? Was he supposed to feel this way? Is he becoming a monster again?

No. This is normal. He's heard about it plenty of times from Greg. It was normal to feel so nervous because it was a new experience for him. He grew up separated from other humans- he never went to school, had never been to the doctor, and for a while, his only true friends seemed to be gems. He guessed Connie was a new experience too. He had never been so close to someone who wasn't part of his family in his entire life. That's why she was so special.

\--------------------------------------

Ideas racked Steven's brain as he descended down the stairs. What would he do? Take her out on a romantic evening under the stars? No, that was too cliche. Walk down the beach and sing her a song? No, he had already tried that. Steven was one for cliche, schmaltzy romantic to-do's. He had absolutely no patience in asking out Connie. He simply could not wait.

He decided on one idea which gave them privacy and was romantic enough to not be considered "casual". He wasn't going to plan everything out extensively. His father once told him "whatever comes from the heart, no matter how messy it ends up, will get better over time", and he decided all that would happen tonight would come from the heart. He loved Connie more than words could describe, so he decided he would show her instead.

Steven hesitantly picked up his phone and tapped Connie's contact icon, holding the phone up to his ear.

_Hello?_

"Hey, Connie."

_Oh, good morning Steven. What's up?_

"Well, I wanted to ask if you could hang out in an hour. I want to show you something."

_Depends. Does it involve bloodthirsty space monsters or an exclusive movie from one of our favorite franchises?_

"Heh... well... neither. I wanted to talk to you about something, and I found this new place that Amethyst warped to when she was looking for one of her rubber ducks, or something like that."

_Huh. Sounds fun. I'll be there in an hour._

"Alright. See ya!"

_Bye!_

Steven put his phone back in his pocket and sighed. Amethyst came up behind him, leaping up onto his shoulders roughly.

"Yo, are you taking Connie to that weird place I found?" She chimed in his ear.

Steven cringed and nodded. "Just for a little privacy. It won't be for long."

Amethyst smirked. "Some alone time, huh? Well, I'll be in my room, then, buddy." She patted him on the back, looked back at him with a smug expression, and walked past the warp pad.

Steven sighed once again, this time heading out to the patio to wait for Connie. Garnet came up behind him, putting her hand on his shoulder with a soft smile.

"Tell me, Garnet. Will everything be okay?" Steven asked, leaning forward to rest his chin on the back of his hand.

"Steven, you'll be fine. I didn't need my future vision to tell you that confidently." She replied, eyes fixed on the horizon.

"I just feel like I'm going to do something wrong." He admitted, looking below.

"She loves you. Even if you did something wrong, she would know it was unintentional." 

"I guess so. It's just so nervewracking."

"That's perfectly normal, Steven. This is a big step for you. But you should know that we're all proud of you." Garnet added with a larger smile.

Steven looked back at the horizon, ready to make the big step. "Thanks, Garnet."

\--------------------------------------

The moment he heard the door open, Steven's heart began to pound. Connie closed the door behind her and ran up to her best friend, giving him a firm hug. Steven's heart couldn't take it.

"Hey! What did you want to show me?" She cheerfully greeted him, smile plastered across her face.

"O-oh... yeah, uh, follow me."

Steven hesitantly took her hand, leading her towards the warp pad. Connie squeezed his palm firmly and ran up beside him.

"Are you okay? Your hand is shaking." She asked, eyebrows slightly furrowing.

Steven reassured her, "yeah, I'm just... nervous."

"Why? Is there something dangerous where you're taking me?"

"No, no, no, not at all. You'll see."

He stepped onto the warp pad with her, expression still slightly tense. He warped the both of them to a field filled with alleys of flowers and a sky that shone a dark violet color. Her concerned expression faded and was replaced with an awed gasp, eyes widened and sparkling.

"Oh, Steven... it's beautiful."

And it was. The seemingly never-ending rows of flowers still shone despite the dark, star-ridden sky. The vibrant colors of foreign flowers brightened the setting and sparkled almost as much as the beautiful night sky above them. Connie sighed with wonder, eyes fixated on the wonderful array of constellations above. Steven tightened his grip on her hand, causing her to snap out of her trance and follow her off of the warp.

They approached a clearing filled with trees dotted with discolored greenish leaves and sat down underneath one of them.

Connie scooted closer to her best friend, gently resting her head on his shoulder. Her subtle warmth sent an ache to his heart, and he barely managed to refrain from wrapping his arms around her. Instead, he gently took her hand in his. Connie traced the lines of his palm, her touch lighter than a feather yet so impactful on Steven's heart. He wished they could stay like this, but he needed to ask the question, and he needed to now.

"Connie?" He finally muttered, barely moving.

She lifted her head from his shoulder and faced him. "Yes?"

"You know, I've been thinking for a while and... I don't know, I just feel like, you know, our friendship kind of feels like some sort of relationship..." He trailed off, voice quivering.

Connie squeezed his hand tighter, reminding him that it was okay for him to voice his thoughts. It wasn't a forceful squeeze, more like a gentle little reminder. He was used to that little signal, so he straightened up and cleared his throat.

"I just love being with you. I love being friends with you, and I love hanging out with you. I love everything about you." He stopped, realizing what he had said as his face turned bright red. He sucked air in through his teeth and bit his lip, refusing to look at Connie. "I-I mean, you know, in like, a friendly way. We're just friends. That's all we'll ever be. Right? You're ok with that, right?" 

He looked over to see Connie's pouting face. "You're so easy to read. Tell me the truth, Steven." She poked his cheek, causing him to hesitantly giggle.

Steven took a deep breath and mustered up the courage to make eye contact with her. He sat up slightly and rested his forehead on hers, trying to slow his heart rate down to synchronize with her light, calm breathing. His quivering fingers reached over to intertwine with hers, palms resting on the ground. In those small moments, he could breathe. He wished it could last forever. And then his brain reminded him that he came there to confess to Connie, not to spend hours just holding her hand and admiring her. He could do all that later.

"I think I'm in love with you." He whispered, heart beating in double time. All those years he spent hugging her, holding her hand, fighting with her, dancing with her, fusing with her... it was all out of love. He always thought it was an innocent, child-like bond, but it had sprouted into something more. Something on a deeper level than either of them could understand. Somehow, he knew the words "I love you" weren't enough.

Connie took a while to process what he had just said. Her fingers recoiled, slipping into fists outside of Steven's hands. She leaned back and looked down at the ground, eyes fixated on one spot in order to focus correctly. Steven couldn't help but worry.

Finally, she spoke, looking up at her friend. "How long have you felt this way?"

He looked into her eyes with pure admiration. It was as if there were entire galaxies of stars inside his pupils. "Ever since I met you. And it's only gotten stronger." He admitted bashfully. 

Connie smiled, face slightly flushed. She contemplated what she was going to do next. Hug him? Hold his hand? _Kiss _him? No, that would be too much. She nervously tapped her fingers on the ground, trying to figure out what to do to show that she felt the same way.__

____

____

Steven frowned a little and stood up, assuming that her silence meant rejection. He tried to mask his disappointment and heartache, mustering a faked, crooked smile. "Let's get you home. It's getting late." He shakily suggested.

Connie didn't care what she was going to do. She wanted him to know just how much he meant to her. Instead of following him towards the warp pad, she stood up and forced him into a hug. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and dug her head into the crook of his neck. Now that he was taller than her, it was much easier to hug him the way she wanted to. Steven, in turn, hugged her back.

"I love you too." She finally said, smiling into Steven's jacket. She removed her head from his chest and looked up at him. She dragged her hands down to his, holding them the way she did so many times. Steven looked as if he was unable to contain himself.

And he was. He leaned forward and kissed her forehead, bringing his hand up to slip strands of hair behind her ear.

Connie leaned back and yawned, bringing her palm towards her mouth. "Tired?" Steven asked, taking one of her hands to lead her back to the warp pad. She nodded and briskly followed along, bringing his arm close to her chest.

"Hey," he started, "how does a date sound?"

Connie thought about it and looked up at the stars. "It sounds great, if you can find a day when I'm not studying." She laughed a little.

"Did today count as a date?"

"I'd say it was."

"Great. I thought so." Steven smiled, tightening his grip on her hand.

"Thank you for that, Steven."

"Of course," he began as he stepped onto the warp pad,

"I'd do anything for you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter was sloppy. The school year ends tomorrow (at least for me), so I've been working on finishing things up. Nevertheless, it was still fun writing this chapter. The little babies are really getting older!! T-T


End file.
